Notes From A Broken Heart

I write occasionally about Kai, my longhaired rescue Dachshund who cajoles, persuades, escorts, and sometimes directs me in his expanding role as protector of our hearth and home. Neither reticent nor penitent, Kai asserts his will, quickly and often.  It never ceases to amaze me how well we communicate.   I can't bark and Kai can't talk, yet each clearly understands the other. I awaken mornings not to the chime of an alarm but to the jangle of Kai's neck leash and the swishing of his tail.  He figured out early on that I'm a light sleeper so it doesn't take much to move me from sleep to sitting up.  Minutes later he waits somewhat impatiently for me to leave the bathroom (basic morning ablutions), then graces me with the "It took you long enough" look.  Then tail wagging furiously, Kai races downstairs to the patio door.   I open it so he can run around the yard, looking for the perfect spot to relieve himself.  In the meantime, I get busy preparing the b

It begins with a choice.  It ends with a choice.   Choice.   Choice occupies the driver's seat at each of life's mileposts.   Landmark research by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross strongly suggests at the end of life people  choose   when  they accept death  (On Death and Dying) .  A person decides.  What constitutes  a choice?  My favored definition identifies choice with freedom since freedom represents one's ability to select.  I'm not sure that choice garners adequate attention in public education settings.  Consequently, teenagers typically graduate with scant preparation for adult decision-making.    I can't speak about private schools' curricula.  I can say with certainty, though, that not enough attention was given to choice, freedom, or decision-making when I taught middle and high school students in public schools.    STOP! Now take your left or right hand (whichever one is dominant), place it on your right (or left) shoulder, and pat it three or more times.  Wh

Three words.  Thank You, Lord.  Thank You, God.  Thank You, Spirit.  I love You.  I praise You.  I worship You. Praise Your name!  Three words that energize.  Three words that empower. Three words that encapsulate.  Three words that insulate. Three words that engage. Three words that save.  Three words that motivate.  Three words that unleash nuclear power.  Love.  Peace.  Joy. Contrast the incomplete list above with three others that pronounce and denounce:  I hate you. You scare me.  I despise you.  I dishonor you.  I loathe you.  I defile you. You sicken me. I deny you.  I denounce you.   What emotions do these words conjure up compared to the previous ones? Singer-Activist Les McCann declared, "I love the lie and lie the love         Hangin' on with push and shove                                                                                      Possession is the motivation                                                                                                  H

Dear CeeCee, Breathtaking, that's what your actions caused last week! Let me explain.  You and I had never knowingly seen the other before.  True, we probably live in the same community that abuts the grocery store.  But I certainly couldn't pick you out of any kind of line-up.  The store was packed with last-day-of-the-year  shoppers.  Even the "Self Checkout" lanes stretched down the aisle to a different area. Both arms cradled packaged, frozen pie shells, chopped scallions and red peppers from produce, heavy cream from the cold case, and a four-piece bag of deli fried chicken.  I simply stopped when I scanned the line and asked you of no one in particular, "Does this line go all the way back to Wyoming?"My goodness! It'll take forever!" "Don't worry; it's moving pretty fast. "Oh, no!" Tell you what," you said.  "Put your stuff in my cart.  It's okay.  You look so much like my son's grandmother, just stand

"There'll be peace in the valley for me someday, There'll be peace in the valley for me, I pray,  No more sorrow and sadness or trouble will be, There'll be peace in the valley for me." My precious Sister in Grief: I recall lyrics I used to hear Mother singing early mornings asI awakened.  It took years for me to connect her song with an event or situation that had occurred, or a premonition of something that may have barely touched her heart.  She sang her prayers of safety against the Unknown or future distress. That's why I write to you today about peace, albeit a different circumstance; nevertheless, "The peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:7, ESV).  I'm a mother who wants to assure you that the Holy Spirit will give you peace so liberally that you eventually will be able to accept the unacceptable. The Holy Spirit, sent as the Comforter will assuage the incoher

Grammar textbooks, even the most elementary ones, define tense as time.   A cursory perusal of verbs forms identifies activity or movement as tenses: present, past, and future as well as present perfect, past perfect, and future perfect.  Have I thrown enough sleep dust in your eyes? Wake up for a minute, please!   That's not all about verb tenses but it suffices in this instance. Call me crazy, weird, or unhinged (won't be the first time!), but I loved learning to conjugate, to break verbs into their functions.  Conjugation refers to linking an event with the time it occurs.  Just a little bit more, please.  Three personal pronouns "tell" who initiates an action or on whom the action occurs ( depicting present past, or future tenses, among others). To illustrate: the verb "dance" when used with the "I" pronoun, becomes I dance, translated into the time , or tense when the action occurred.    In like manner, using personal pronouns you, he, she,

  Dear Mama, Or did your son call you, "Mom, Mother, Ma," or some other term of endearment?  I think we embrace the adage, "Mothers are the closest representation of God's heart."  I write to you, then, as a "Mom," myself, as well as sharing the honor of serving as ordained ministers of the Gospel.  We met for 52 weeks, exegeting (studying) Scriptures; learning to refine "preaching styles"; engaging in energetic discourse about spirituality and religiosity, passing increasingly difficult examinations; and becoming comfortable with ministerial conventions. Dear Friend, as I presume to comfort you now as "Sistah Girls" in a club to which  no one wants to belong,  "the pain-no-words-can-describe-pain" rose like smoke from a chimney and wafted its way into my heart.  I need to warn you not to blame yourself! Mothers, especially, have mastered an "It must be my fault" reasoning that rarely if ever dissipates.  You are