Notes From A Broken Heart

"God is love! Those who are living in love are living in God, and God lives through them....Our love for others is our grateful response to the love God first demonstrated in us" (1 John 4: 16a; 19, tPt)   The first, second, and third Books of John blew my burgeoning spiritual growing pains into an uncharted region. The two above-referenced verses absolutely clarified that there's "Somebody bigger than you and I."  And that He has created all and everything.  Hmm. Amazingly, this knowledge initiated  freedom  I hadn't imagined.  I learned that He is the Author and Finisher of my faith.  That He alone bestows the measure of faith I need when I need it.  And when I ask Him for it! " Well now," as the deacons in my childhood church would intone. Matthew 7:7, 8; Mark 11:24; and Luke 11:9,10 opened my eyes wider, while so many of the Psalms soothed my aching heart.  "In my life, there's been heartache and pain I don't know if I can face it

Metamorphosis:  "Transformation, mobility, flexibility,  flux, alteration, modification, outcome, processing"   It's wonder-filling when I can marry knowledge to   understanding .  I know a lot, derived from numerous venues.  Some are lore-based while provable facts account for others. Trivia-based information ranks high, along with historical facts and science-based concepts.  I even toyed with majoring in philosophy until its panoramic scope discouraged further exploration.  Just a bit too disconcerting for a teen college coed.   Libraries remain my favored haven where I spent hours devouring information and accumulating data.  I love the smell of books ( yes, I smell books)  and the lure of captured treasures in the stacks.  All of it produces the synergy of knowledge and understanding. Too, I can recall verses from the Holy Bible, stored in memory from Sunday school classes and worship service messages. "For this is how much  he loved the world---he gave his one

  "And she said to them, "Do not call me Naomi; call me  Mara,"...  (Ruth 1:20, NLT). Dearest Joy: I call you Joy , although it's not the name on your birth certificate.  I call you Joy  because that's who you are in Spirit, to untold others, and to me.  Can you count the times your mere presence has ushered in spontaneous delight, whether or not you knew it? Do you? Of course, you don't.  You're too engrossed in loving, caring for, and cocooning others to tally. Among myriad other undertakings.    The ultimate caretaker of humans, your penchant for doing good extends to stray cats, dogs, and possibly rabbits squirrels, and other four-legged creatures.   Now that I'm more aware of and attuned to Holy Spirit, I recognize how He arranged our initial meeting.  " For such a time as this" (Esther 4:14).  Duh.  We met sometime before my precious Courtney died suddenly and in fact, had grown our friendship through volunteerism.  Remember how you in

  Often, when I tend to linger in sorrow (Mother would call it "wallowing in self-pity"), one of her "go-to" songs intrudes.   "(I thank You, Jesus) I  thank You, Jesus.   (I thank You, Jesus) I thank You, Jesus. I thank You, Jesus, I thank You, Lord. oh, You've brought me from a mighty, a mighty long way, a mighty long way."  No matter the time of day or night Mother sang the song, it was with unabashed gusto.  Years passed before I began to understand her "Thank You, Lord" as a victory song.  A declaration of having won that particular skirmish.  The song stood as a leave-no-victims-behind affirmation and signaled a readiness to enter the next battlefield.  She often hummed,  "I am on the battlefield for my Lord ."  It took years, no decades longer, to identify what Mother's songs in general and this one in particular signified. Much later, authors wrote best-sellers about the workings of the mind. As a farmer (yes, farmer),

"What's wrong with me, God? Or more accurately, maybe I should ask,  what's right with me?   Why do I knit threads of doubt into skeins of distrust and disbelief?  I'm like Penelope knitting a garment on Monday, unraveling it Monday night, and beginning anew Tuesday morning.  I've squandered decades of energy on negligible enterprises.  I was present  yesterday when You gave me another download.  A magnificent one.  Yet, not two hours later, I had picked up another thread of "have nots" and started weaving it into  meaningless nothingness. Before I consciously perceived it, I had begun the "worry walk" again, even though months ago I'd given up  fretting for Lent.  For the umpteenth time!   Father, I know Your Word.  Especially since my parents, staunch and steadfast believers, kept me in Sunday school and Children's Church long before I could sit still and quiet.  A natural curiosity about everything propelled me to search, study, and o

Kai, my beloved long-haired Dachsund, finally made his grooming appointment.  And oh, what a difference a shampoo and scissors can make!  You might remember that Kai lives the most unassuming life.  Daily walks highlight his days except when it's too cold, too rainy, or I'm just too lazy to make that extra effort! His black and white coat grows slowly and can withstand an extra couple of months or so between visits with Lisa.  Especially during the snowy or inclement Colorado winter months. This year, winter lingered longer and spring took its time pushing crocuses and tulips through the soil.    Not as bad as a long, Norweigian winter, but long enough!  Groomer Lisa's, skills generate loads of "parents" vying for an appointment.  She's just that professionally adroit.  Getting on the roster took another couple of weeks, so by the time Lisa came to take Kai into the Vet's Office, he looked a little Alaskan-shaggy.   And yes, she had to gently coax him from