The times they are a-changing

 "I like your hair," Catherine complimented the young man working the cash register at check-out.  A shy smile accompanied the "Thank you."

"What do you use to get it looking so good," I asked, always searching for the Holy Grail of Black hair products.  It's an oft-repeated question I pose to both genders.  I wasn't born with the "I can handle hair"gene.  In fact, when my daughter Tracey announced that she'd "be doing Coco's and my hair from now on," relief flooded throughout my soul!  

As a fledgling young mom, I appreciated the help, if only from a preteen.  I'd never succeeded at doing my own hair, so how could I be expected to know how to do the right thing with theirs? We'd play "Beauty shop" when I could no longer avoid washing, rinsing, and conditioning their hair.  Nor could I distract them with colorful barrettes, twists, or ribbons.  Even at eight years old, Tracey felt compelled to answer the unasked question. 

 Because you have us leaving home looking like orphans!  That's why."

"Oh. Hmm.  Where can I find the product," I asked the young man, willing to travel miles to get it.  

"It's here in the beauty products four aisles over, on the right side."

Even though I'd paid for my purchases, Catherine volunteered to hold my place in line.  (She's a brave soul since the store was packed with frenzied shoppers).  As I quickly scanned the aisle, the young clerk appeared next to me, bent down, and pulled a jar from the bottom shelf.  My goodness, he showed even more courage than Catherine, since he'd left his register unattended!  That's consummate customer service, I thought as  I picked up another bottle for Catherine. 

"I really did like his hair; it looked soft and still held a style," Catherine remarked.  I hope it works as well for me!"

"Amen, Sister."

How ironic that a discussion, which historically would've occurred took between a hairstylist and a customer in a traditional beauty shop.  It would be filled with females whose faces reflected every hue from"light, bright, and almost white," to deep rich chocolate.  Yet here we were in a store stocked with everything from aerosol products to towels, toys, engaged in a conversation about hair-dos with a dude! 

"Those were the days, my friend
We thought they'd never end"
We'd sing and dance forever and a day
We'd live the life we choose
We'd fight and never lose
For we were young and sure to have our way."

The short exchange between the young man and us could well capture salient features of enslaved Africans who survived the transport on slave ships from the West Coast of Africa to the shores of colonial Virginia.  I embrace"culture"  as the historical, sociological, and spiritual embodiment of "who we are" and "the way we are"  now as  African Americans.  Of course, culture reflects too much more than can be included here.

  

Suffice it to say that the way we are has changed dramatically and emphatically over more than four centuries of life in the United States. The nuclear family, consisting of mom, dad, and offspring barely exists among African Americans anymore,  Our reliance on God "who created the heavens and earth" has been replaced with various and sundry idols and icons.  Education, the traditional transit from poverty to prosperity has undergone so many mutations that it is barely recognizable.  Critical Race Theory, indeed!

Overnight it seems, the dress code for teachers (my former vocation) changed from suits, dresses, and polished shoes to now allows pedagogues to the bare midriff,  often with navel art showing, as an expectation, if not a "right."  Designer "sweats" and tee-shirts are worn as schoolday attire.

"Oh my Lord, what's happened to this world,"  would've been Mother and (Grand)Mama's lament.  Then they'd importune, "Now let us all go back to the old landmark, and we'll stay in the service of the Lord."  Meanwhile, I'm searching for a ticket line where I can buy a one-way passage back to the good old days."

The line it is drawn, the curse it is cast
The slowest now, will later be last
As the present now will later be past
The order is rapidly fadin'
And the first one now will be last
'Cause the times they are a-changin'"

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