Everything Must Change

"Everything must change.  Nothing stays the same.  That's the way of time, and no one stays the same..."  

When Quincy Jones, the music maestro, recorded those lyrics from his Body Heat album, they seem  so innocuous, almost non-event-ish. And I suppose when viewed through lens of innocence, change appears harmless.  That's the way of time... Yes, everything must change, BUT, UNLESS, or UNTIL that change heralds  pain. I don't means stub-your-toe-pain or even  a catch an unexpected blow to the plexus pain.  Those are painful, but not permanent.  I'm thinking about life-uprooting, earth-shattering, stop-the-world-I-want-to-get-off pain! 

No matter how minor, major, whatever, I think subconsciously we fight change.  Maybe that's why we lament in song, "The old gray mare she ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to  be; the old gray mare she ain't what she used to be many long years ago" We want things to always stay in a happy stasis where Leave It to Beaver lived, and where problems came but were solved or settled in 30-minute segments, minus commercials.  

Back in the day, soap operas somewhat prepared us for change, with their ever-evolving, revolving, and sometimes revolting story lines.  And certainly "Haute Couture" fashion extravaganzas in New York annually presented change, albeit strange, change.

"The young become the old, and mysteries do unfold. Cause that's the way of time, nothing and no one goes unchanged." 

One of the things that upsets us is when you've gotten used to, even comfortable, with the way things are and then, BOOM, out of nowhere something changes! You're just toodling right along, thinking everything's okay at work, for example, when you're confronted with the feared "pink slip." Even worse, you're paraded down the long aisle of cubicles  and summarily escorted out the front door! Unexpected. Unwanted.  Unbelievable.  But there it is! It's hard to "roll with the punches" when you didn't know you were in a fight.  You're supposed to "take it like a man/woman," right? I don't think so.

"There are not many things in life you can be sure of---except rain comes from the clouds, sun lights up the sky, and hummingbirds do fly." 

Yeah, that would be fine if I were a hummingbird, flitting around on a golf course, or if there was a Land of the Hummingbirds where all I had to wrestle with were hummingbird minutia.  No, I live in a world where one's job defines him or her, even if they try in their minds to retreat to a  perfect world.  As children, we were told to "Go to school, get a good education, and you'll be somebody!" (At least I was). Justifiably or not, we swallowed that promise,  no questions asked,  It's interesting that we're taught problem solving and decision making skills at every level in school and from every book, except the Holy Bible.  (Now, where did that come from?)

"Winter turns to spring, a wounded  heart will heal. But never much too soon; yes, everything must change. The young becomes the old and mysteries do unfold, cause that's the way of time.  Nothing and no one goes unchanged.

Death is unyielding.  It marks "The End," whether you've finished reading the book, are waiting on the ninth ending of a World Series baseball game, or eagerly being called from  the bench to get into a March Madness playoff game.  Death is. It's too harsh, undeniably
uncompromising, and too often, coming without warning.  But even if it had come with advanced notice, Death can't be changed or be replayed.  For those and a million other reasons, the change that my Daughter's death wrought has left me fighting, flailing, and fumbling with myriad emotions,none of which eased even the concept called change.

There are not many things in life you can be sure of, except rains come the cloud, sun lights up the sky and butterflies do fly." Rain comes from the clouds, sun lights up the sky, and music, music makes me cry."

It seems I don't get a vote.